Raising Children with Special Needs When You Live Overseas

 

Forest, Hope, Radiant, Zen, Sunflare

“Your daughter has a rare genetic syndrome called Cri-du-Chat Syndrome, and she needs a feeding tube.”

My dreams, my desires to live overseas, seemed to shatter with that diagnosis. The past 10 months all made sense. This was the reason she was hospitalized in Beijing for bronchitis at 3 months old. This was the reason for choking almost every time she nursed. And this explained why, just a few months before, she lay limp with pneumonia on a large hospital bed in the middle of China next to six other children with some sort of lung infection. All of this led to me flying alone with her to the U.S. for medical tests. This was the reason I sat in that small clean consultation room with a doctor I barely knew.

Was this going to be the reason God would end our time overseas?

And then the haunting question, How am I going to tell my husband Uwe half way around the world on the phone?

To date, that was the hardest phone call I have ever had to make.

When Uwe and our oldest son (20 months) arrived in the U.S., we believed our time overseas was over. At that time we only knew of one other family living overseas with a child with special needs, but our daughter seemed to have more medical issues. As we consulted with surgeons, therapists, and doctors, not a single one hesitated to tell us to go back. This was incredible to us because we, like so many others, didn’t think it possible that families affected by disabilities could live and work overseas. So with a list of diagrammed exercises, extra feeding buttons and bags, and a feeding machine, we returned to China. Uwe went back to work as principal at the international school, and I began therapy with Matthea. Life changed, but God had not. He was still good. He was still providing.

Our story isn’t unique. There are others like us. Last week I was able to interview eight families ministering overseas who also have children with special needs. All of our stories seemed to share the following three themes.

You can finish reading over at A Life Overseas

Book Review: OF STILLNESS AND STORM by Michèle Phoenix

OF STILLNESS AND STORM: a novel29492092-_sr1200630_

by Michèle Phoenix

Published: 2016

*Please note as an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Summary:

Sam and Lauren sell everything they own in the US to move to Nepal. It has been their dream to share the gospel with the distant tribes of the world. But it wasn’t their son’s dream. Sam treks the mountains for weeks at a time. He comes home tired and smelly but doesn’t want any luxuries because many in Nepal live in worse conditions. Lauren’s sense of adventure soon flattens after their move as she bumps along daily to a job she doesn’t like, fights a losing battle with the electricity, and watches her son slowly change from a fun and happy kid to a teen who just exists and resents her for everything. As the situation tenses on the home front, Lauren has an online encounter with a friend from her past. Her isolation leads to disillusionment, and things come crashing around her.

My Thoughts:

One of the reviews I read compared this book to THE POISONWOOD BIBLE, and I agree. Both stories drew up some deep emotions in me. With that said, if you experienced emotional trauma as a child, this book could be a trigger. So, read with caution.

 Michèle Phoenix is an MK (missionary kid) and has worked with MKs for many years. Her expertise and her personal experience give this story the raw emotions many who work overseas do not want to face. It asks the hard questions indirectly by watching this family try to survive while doing what they believe the Lord has called them to do.

I know that not everyone who reads this blog is a Christian, but the issues/themes in this book can be related to anyone who is trying to raise their family in a different culture than their own. Often, the children may not feel they have a choice in moving.